Everyone is more confident than me...

Do you think everyone is more confident than you?

I know EXACTLY how you feel. When I was an associate, I was convinced that everyone around me was twice as confident at me.

But here's what I've discovered over the years .... it's not true. 

The truth is, I really had no idea whether the people around me felt confident or not because I'm not a mind-reader (sadly...). Confidence is just an emotion. Sometimes we feel it and sometimes we don't. 

We make assumptions about confidence based on how people behave. Perhaps you assume someone is feeling confident because they speak-up in meetings or put themselves forward for big projects. Just remember that these things could be driven by any number of emotions. I know that's true because in my early years as a lawyer I did those things from determination and a dose of courage. No doubt people thought it was confidence, but they would have been wrong. 

So, be careful mind-reading other people...

This is really important to say because so many of my clients think their lack of confidence is some sort of deficiency. And it's because they imagine that everyone around them feels it all the time. They don't! 

We for sure can increase our confidence by getting rid of socialised thought patterns that block it (imposter syndrome, people pleasing, perfectionism etc. etc.). That's the work I do with my clients. But please remember that you don't need confidence to take action in your career. I promise you, there are plenty of people around you taking action from anything but! 

If you're interested in learning more about working with me to increase your confidence or promote yourself more effectively, just click HERE.